Chapter 88

Christmas. It truly was a children's holiday - the adults in her life were driving her nuts!

Brianna's gazed drifted from the dancing flames in her fireplace to the twinkling lights on the tree she'd set up in the corner of her living room.  Mentally reviewing the contents of the colourfully wrapped gifts piled under it, she wondered if she was missing anything.

She leaned her head back against the couch she was curled up on and sighed. She'd always loved this apartment, but now it felt...empty......too quiet. There was no yelling, no crying, no laughing, just the occasional siren and the soft music from her stereo. 

Normally she enjoyed the peace and quiet. She used the time to relax and recharge and work through any problems she had. But tonight she was just....lonely. Her apartment was warm and cozy, but she still missed Jon's heat next to her. She sighed again and reached for her tea cup. 

When her phone rang a few minutes later, she smiled and answered without looking at the display. "Hey."

"Hey." His voice was as soft as hers. "What are you doing?"

"Sitting in front of a fire, looking at my tree.......thinking of you."

Jon smiled. "Me too."

"Kids all in bed?"

"Yeah. At least, they're supposed to be. With Jake I can never be sure."

"Funny, I never have a problem getting him to go to bed."

He snorted. "That's because he loves you. He would do anything for you." Kind of like what's happening to his father.

Brianna smiled. "The feeling's mutual." If only his father felt the same way!

"Have you given any more thought to Christmas and where you're going to be?"

Sighing, Brianna grimaced. "Jon....we've been over this a hundred times." Argued about it would be a more accurate description. She was being torn between her family and his over where she was going to spend the holiday.

"I know and I don't mean to push.....well, actually I do. I want you here with us Christmas Day. Christmas Eve would be even better. I want us to all wake up together Christmas morning." He paused. "It's what the kids want."

"It's not fair to use the kids to try to manipulate me Jon."

But it works so well. "I never claimed to fight fair to get something I really want."

"It's not that simple for me."

"Sure it is. Where do you want to be? With us or them?"

"You know the answer to that, but they're my family! How would you like to have to choose between your parents and me?"

"My father isn't a chauvinistic misogynist, so it would never happen!" Grimacing, Jon scrubbed a hand over his face and blew out a breath. "I'm sorry, Golden Eyes. I shouldn't have said that. You can't help how he is and you've suffered more than anyone because...of....his.....attitude." A thump from upstairs drew his gaze to the ceiling and brought him to his feet.

"What's wrong?"

"Something heavy fell on the floor upstairs."

"Romeo fall out of bed again?" She guessed. It had happened several times when she'd been at the house.

"I'm thinking that's what happened." He climbed the stairs and stopped in his youngest son's doorway. "Yep. He's on the floor.  Didn't even wake up. Maybe I should get a thick rug and just let him sleep there."

"Jon! It's too cold. Pick him up."

"Yes dear. Hang on." Setting the phone down, he bent and scooped Romeo up, returning him to his bed and tucking him in. "See if you can stay there this time." He picked up the phone. "Okay, he's back in bed.....for now anyway."

Brianna yawned. "That sounds like a good idea." She turned off the fireplace and the lights on her way to her bedroom. Climbing into her lonely bed, she sighed. "I wish you were here to cuddle up with."

"Me too." He returned downstairs to the couch and his glass of wine.

Tucking the phone under her ear, she closed her eyes, trying to pretend he was next to her. "Sing to me Blue Eyes."

He smiled wryly. "What do you want me to sing?"

"You decide." She didn't care, she just wanted to hear his voice.

Jon thought for a moment, then began to softly sing the verse that had popped into his head:

"This world don't give you nothing it can't take away

Everybody holding on to something

Nobody wants to fade away.

No forgiveness on the streets of this town

I left my patience at a traffic light

There's no denying I almost lost it

Threw in the towel, too tired to fight

Tonight I need you

More than yesterday

Tonight I need you

Take me, touch me

Make me come alive

Hurt me, heal me

Come and make me feel it

Rescue me tonight

Love me back to life"

They both realized at the same time how prophetic those words turned out to be. Jon fell silent. Brianna bit her lip and squeezed her eyes tight against the threatening tears.

Jon stared thoughtfully into his wineglass. "I owe you for that."

"For what?"

"Rescuing me. Bringing me back to life. Even if it was tough love."

"I won't say it was my pleasure, because it definitely doesn't rank on my list of fun times, but I won't say I regret it either - just the way I had to do it."

"Me too. But I'm glad - and the kids are glad - that you had the intestinal fortitude to do it. And I'm sorry that I let it get to that point."

"Pain and grief can do that to you." She hesitated. "Dot had warned me it might happen."

Jon shook his head in wonder. "She always knew me so well. So she told you how to bring me out of it."

"Yes.."

She planned for everything. "I guess it's a good thing she did." He scrubbed a hand over his face again. "Back to Christmas..."

"Jon...." Brianna groaned.

"I'm not going to give up, so you might as well just give in."

"You get your way too much as it is."

He grinned. "But don't I always make it worth your while?"

Brianna grunted. "It's late. I need to get some sleep."

Jon would have laughed, but he didn't want to press his luck. He wasn't successful at getting his way so much by not knowing when to back off. "Okay. Sleep well Golden Eyes. I'll talk to you tomorrow. We can finalize our plans."

"Jon!" She was talking to dead air. He'd hung up before she could respond. "Damn that man!"

She hadn't finished her first cup of coffee the next morning when her mother called.

"Morning Brianna. I'm calling about Christmas."

Brianna groaned. "I don't know yet when I'll get to Chicago Mom. I'm still trying to work that out."

"What's the problem?"

"Jon wants me to spend Christmas Eve and Christmas Day with him and the kids." She closed her eyes and braced herself for the counter argument.

"Then go to New Jersey. Come to Chicago on Boxing Day, or even the twenty-seventh."

To say Brianna was shocked would be an understatement. "Really?"

 "Isn't that where you really want to be?"

"Well....yes." Brianna admitted.

"Then go. Be there with him and those beautiful children."

"You won't be upset?"

"We'll still see you over the holidays and that's all that matters to me. It doesn't matter what day. Those children need you with them more."

"Wow! Thanks Mom."

"Just let me know which day so I can tell your brothers. See if they can come then too."

"Okay. I'll talk to Jon and let you know."

When Sara hung up the phone, she sighed and turned to find her husband frowning at her. "What are you doing Sara?"

"Trying to ensure we don't lose our daughter completely."

"By encouraging her to not come home for Christmas?"

"By encouraging her to follow her heart and spend Christmas where she wants to." Sara argued.

"She belongs here. With her family."

"If my instincts are right, in the near future Jon and his children will be her family. She should be with them."

But Edward wouldn't relent. "When and if they get married she can spend the holidays there. Until then, she should be here."

"If we push that, push her to choose between us and them, we may not see her at all." Sara warned.

"Nonsense. She knows her place."

Closing her eyes. Sara prayed for strength. She was so tired of having this same argument. "Edward, when are you going to stop with that? This is the twenty-first century and she's a grown woman. Her place is wherever she wants it to be! And if you don't stop trying to dictate their lives you're going to alienate our grandchildren as well!"

Edward just rolled his eyes and opened the newspaper on the kitchen table in front of him.

Sara picked up the frying pan from the dish drain and wondered if it might knock some sense into her husband.