Saturday, April 26, 2014

Chapter 69


He arrived home in time to read his youngest two their bedtime story, Romeo cuddled on his lap, Jake nestled beside him. When he finished, Jake sighed heavily. Jon tilted his head to look at him. "What's wrong buddy?"

"I miss Mommy."

Jon slid his arm around him, hugging him close and kissed his head. "I know buddy, so do I." Then he thought of something sure to bring a smile to his son's face. "Hey, know what?"

"What?"

"Bri's coming to see us tomorrow."

"Reawy?" The small face lit up. "Yay!" He turned to the doorway. "Hear dat Gamma? Bianna's coming tomorrow!"

Carol smiled at her grandson. His speech was becoming clearer all the time, but his 'L's still gave him problems and his 'R's were hit and miss. "I heard. That'll be fun for you. You'd better get to sleep so that tomorrow comes faster."

"Okay!" He slid down in his bed with a yawn. "Nite!"

Jon chuckled and stood with Romeo half asleep in his arms. "Nite buddy." He tucked in the blanket with his free hand and bent to kiss his head.

In Romeo's room, he tucked him into bed and kissed his cheek. "Nite little man."

Carol fingered his pajamas. "He needs some new pajamas." She looked at the dresser on the opposite wall. "And probably some other things as well. I guess I should look over his clothes."

"Oh, ummm....."

"Or is Brianna looking after it?" Her look was knowing.

"She mentioned it when she told me about taking Steph shopping." He looked at his mother. "Are you upset about that?"

Carol waved a hand. "Of course not. I understand a teenager wanting to shop with someone younger who's up on all the latest trends and not her old grandmother. I think it's great that they enjoy each other's company."

"Me too." He started for the door. "Do you want some coffee?"

"I just put on a fresh pot. It should be ready."

In the kitchen, Jon poured while his mother took a seat on a stool at the island. John Sr. walked in and sat beside her. "Pour me a cup of that too would you please?"

"Sure." Jon filled another cup and passed it over. He saw the look his parents exchanged. "What?"

Carol glance towards the doorway to the living room.

"They're watching TV." John assured his wife.

"Steph and Jesse think you have a girlfriend." Carol warned her son.

Jon frowned. "Where did they get that idea?"

"I don't know." Carol answered.

"Is it true?" John Sr. asked.

"Yes." Jon admitted, almost absently, his mind on his mother's revelation. "But I've been careful not to say anything in front of them. I didn't think they were ready. How did they react to the idea?"

"They're a little uncomfortable. They see it as a betrayal to their mother." She hesitated, thinking about the letter, but decided not to tell him. That was between Dorothea and her children. "I talked to them a little. I think they just need a little time to get used to the idea. They'll come around. Especially if it's who I think it is." She smirked. "She's a good choice."

John looked between his wife and his oldest son. "Who is it?"

"You mean Matty didn't tell you?" Jon was surprised.

"No, when did you tell him?" Carol asked.

"I didn't. He and Desiree figured it out themselves."

"It's Brianna, isn't it?" John clued in.

Jon nodded. "Yeah. We're giving it a try anyway."

"Good. I'm glad to see you healing and ready to move on." Carol patted his hand. "Just....make sure before you tell the kids. Don't rush it. You'll know when they're ready."

He doubted it, but he figured at least one of the women in his life would tell him.




When Brianna arrived at the mansion the next day, she stepped out of her car and braced for the exuberant greeting of the fearsome guard dog. Seventy pounds of fur, muscle and licking tongue pinned her to the car. She petted and pushed and tried to avoid drowning in dog drool. "Hello Copper......Copper stop! Copper heel!"

"Copper leave her alone." Jesse grabbed the dog's collar and pulled him away.

"Thanks Jess." Brianna wiped her face and picked up her briefcase which had fallen to the ground during the mauling.

Together, they walked towards the house.

"How are you doing? Ready to go back to school?"

He shrugged. "I guess."

"Anything you need?"

"Naw, I'm set. Grandma's going to take me shopping."

Brianna smiled. Jesse hadn't really discovered girls yet, so wasn't very particular about his clothes. Or maybe he was just like his father - jeans and t-shirts were all he needed most of the time too. "Okay, well, let me know if you need something."

"Thanks."

Entering the house, Brianna closed the door behind them and took a couple steps into the foyer.

"Bianna!" Jake ran in and threw his arms around her waist to hug her.

"Hi buddy!"

"Hey! Come back here you little monkey!"

Brianna didn't have to wonder who Jon was talking to for long. Romeo, wearing only a diaper, came running in to hug her before shifting behind her to peek out around her legs.

"Romeo! Come here!" A harried looking Jon followed his son. "Oh! Hi. Didn't realize you were here." He took a step towards her, then stopped. Idiot! You sound like a teenager with his first girlfriend!

Brianna raised a brow at his awkward greeting. "Hi. I just got here. Rough morning?"

He glanced around for a distraction - anything to stop him from taking her in his arms and greeting her like his body longed to do, the type of greeting he couldn't do in front of his kids, at least not yet - and found it in the form of his youngest clinging to her legs. "Trying to put clothes on him is like trying to dress a wiggling worm. And he's fast!"

Romeo giggled, unfazed by his father's glare.

"Like father, like son." Brianna gestured towards his bare chest. Looking down, she ran her fingers through Romeo's hair. "Should we get you dressed?"

Romeo nodded and reached up to take her hand and walk with her into the living room.

Jon watched in disbelief as she quickly and efficiently put shorts and a t-shirt on his suddenly co-operative son. He shook his head in disgust. "Brat."

Romeo grinned, giggled, kissed Brianna's cheek, then sat on the floor to play with his blocks.

Brianna chuckled and grabbed her briefcase. "I'll head down to your office." She squeezed his shoulder as she passed him.

"Okay." Jon watched her walk down the hallway, fingers tapping on his thighs. Restless, he stood and paced to the window and back to the couch again. When Jesse and Jake came into the room, he stood. "I'm going to the office. Jesse, keep an eye on your brothers please."

Jesse sighed, but nodded. When his father's back was to him, he smiled.

"Brianna here?" Steph scanned the room as she entered.

"Uh huh. She's in the office...with Dad."

Stephanie grinned. "Yeah? Jake where're you going?"

"To see Bianna."

Jesse blocked his path. "They're working squirt. Leave them alone for awhile."

Seeing Jake's frowning pout, Stephanie distracted him. "Why don't we go get a snack? I think Grandma made some cookies."

"Okay."



Brianna looked up at the sound of the door closing. She stood and stepped aside to let him have his chair. But he didn't rush to take it. When he reached her, he slid his arms around her waist and pulled her against him. His head dipped until his mouth could capture hers. "Mmmm." He lifted his head and grinned at her. "Now that's a proper hello."

She licked her lips and watched his eyes darken. "I feel a bit like a teenager again. Only this time, instead of hiding from my parents, we're hiding from your kids."

"Speaking of your parents, am I ever going to meet them?"

Her brows rose. "You want to?" The thought hadn't even crossed her mind.

Jon shrugged. "You've met all of my family, it's only logical. Or is there some minimum number of dates requirement before I can be introduced to your family?"

She smiled. "No."

Her tone had him frowning. "What's the problem? Afraid they won't like me?"

Brianna knew he was trying to be funny, but the truth was, while she knew her mother would welcome him with open arms, she doubted her father would be as agreeable. "My father can be a bit...overbearing. And his views are a little....old-fashioned."

"You mean he wouldn't approve of you dating a musician." Jon guessed.

"Yeah. Your saving grace is that you're a successful one. Plus my brother has been singing him your praises as a businessman."

He raised a brow. "Somebody been checking up on me?"

"What would you if you had a sister - or for Steph as far as that goes? Wouldn't you check out any man she was spending as much time with as you and I have? Especially if she was travelling all over the world with that man?"

"Inside out." Jon admitted. He sighed. "Now I feel like a teenager again."

Brianna ran her hands over his chest and shoulders. "Not from my perspective you don't."

Jon laughed and bent his head to kiss her again.

After several minutes she broke the kiss and eased back. "We'd better at least look like we're working in case someone comes visiting."

"I thought we were working....on each other." He kissed her again.

"Mmmm. Such a workaholic!"

Footsteps running down the hallway had them breaking apart just before Jake burst into the room.

"And this is the response I typed up." Brianna handed a folder across the desk to Jon. "Hey buddy. What's up?"

"When you gonna be done workin so we can pway?"

When are you going to sleep so Daddy can play? "Give us until lunch time buddy." Jon replied.

Jake heaved a heavy sigh. "Okay."

The adults watched him trudge from the room and grinned.

When Jon stood up, Brianna read his expression correctly and shook her head. "Like you told Jake, work first, play later."

Jon heaved a sigh that sounded remarkably like his son's and sat down again. "Okay."


Saturday, April 19, 2014

Chapter 68


Sunday afternoon Brianna sat on her balcony sipping a glass of wine and contemplating the arrangement of a variety of lilies, lilacs and a single rust coloured sunflower that had been delivered a short time earlier. It was unique and pretty. Kind of demure with a dash of bold - kind of like her - and smelled heavenly. Where he'd been able to find lilacs at this time of year she couldn't imagine.  The card read simply 'I'm an asshole, I'm sorry' in his distinctive scrawl. As far as apology bouquets went, this one was pretty good.

He'd also left a couple voice mails, but she hadn't responded yet. She wasn't sure she was ready to let him off the hook that easily. She understood that he was going through a difficult time, but that didn't mean she should just accept being treated like a.....plaything. She deserved better.

So she avoided contact with him the rest of the day. Monday would be soon enough to deal with her love life - and her boss.



Jon was frustrated with the communications silence, but he wasn't angry at her. He had no one to blame but himself. He'd brought it on. But she couldn't ignore him forever. Tomorrow was a work day.....and he knew where to find her.



He stood in the doorway connecting their offices for a moment, reviewing his battle plan, before walking in to stand in front of her desk. "Hey."

Brianna glanced up from her computer, a raised eyebrow the only sign of her surprise at seeing him in the office. She had a feeling he hadn't come in to deal with work issues. That was okay, she'd half expected something like this. "Hey."

Noticing her white silk tank top, he couldn't resist. "It's supposed to rain today, you know." His grin was more than slightly on the lecherous side.

It took her a moment to figure out that he was referring to the day she'd gotten caught in a downpour wearing the same top and ended up wearing his shirt. Her lips twitched at the memory of him trying not to stare at her nipples revealed by the wet silk. But she wasn't ready to give in quite yet. She gestured to a duffle bag sitting beside her desk. "I learn from my mistakes."

Jon wasn't sure if that was a jab at him or not. "Meaning what?"

She ignored his defensive tone. "Meaning I brought a change of clothes just in case."

"Oh." He wasn't sure how, but he'd totally lost control of the conversation. He tried to get it back. "Did you get the flowers I sent? I wasn't sure when you didn't answer my calls."

"Yes, I got them. They're beautiful. Thank you."

"And?"

"And what?"

"Am I forgiven for being an asshole? I really didn't mean to ignore you,"

Brianna sighed and leaned back in her chair. "I don't think you're really ready for a relationship Jon." 

"Yes I am."

"I think you want to be, but you're not."

How the hell does she keep turning it back on me? "Don't tell me what I am and am not ready for!" Spinning away from her knowing look, he paced the room and raked his hand through his hair. "Maybe I should rethink this. You're driving me crazy already!"

Brianna, lips twitching again, simply shrugged.

Jon sighed and sat down in the chair across the desk from her. "Despite what you think, I am ready to move on. I'm just....out of practice."

"Are you sure that's all it is?"

He frowned. "What are you thinking?"

"Maybe it's me. That I'm your assistant I mean. Maybe you're having problems seeing me as anything more than your employee."

He considered her comment and had to admit she had a point. The women in his life had always been either work contacts or personal ones. There had never been any that were both. Not even Dorothea. "You may be right. I'm not used to a woman in my life crossing over between the professional and personal sides. I guess I haven't quite figured out how to deal with that."

Later, she would remember this conversation and have to acknowledge she'd been warned.

"I guess I'm going to have to work on that." He raised a brow and smiled at her.

She couldn't help but smile back. I have a feeling it would be in my best interest to build up a resistance to that smile!

"So, I was thinking that we should go out. On a date."

She eyed him warily. Her head was warning her to say no, to protect her heart, just cut her losses and forget pursuing any kind of a romantic relationship with him. But her heart insisted that she give him another chance. If it worked out, it would be worth it. "What did you have in mind?" It wasn't like they could just go to a movie - unless it was a premiere. He'd get swarmed.

"Why don't we start with dinner tonight and talk about it?"

"What about the kids?"

"Mom and Dad are feeding them tonight, so I'm free until they bring them back at bedtime."

"Okay,"

A knock on her door prevented either of them from saying any more. 

Evelyn entered with a stack of envelopes. "Sorry to interrupt. Brianna, here's today's mail."

"Thanks."

As Evelyn left, Paul came in. "Hi Jon. Evelyn told me you were here. How's everything going?"

While the men talked. Brianna opened mail and let their conversation wash over her. Where the hell can I go on a date with a Rockstar in mourning, where the vultures won't find us and start wild rumours? Without conscious thought, she placed the mail in two piles: invitations and correspondence.

When Paul left, Jon leaned on her desk. "Anything interesting?" Picking up the pile closest to him, he flipped through, scanning the invitations.

Before she could answer, her cell phone rang. She glanced at the display and frowned. The area code said it was New Jersey, but she didn't recognize the number. "Brianna Prentiss."

"Bri, you've got to help me!"

"Steph? What's wrong?"

Jon's head snapped up and his body tensed.

"Grandma says she wants to take me back to school shopping!"

"That sounds nice."

"Are you kidding? She’ll have me in frilly dresses and overalls and....pigtails! You've got to do something! Help me! Please!"

When Brianna's frown changed to a grin and she laughed, Jon relaxed and waited to see what was going on. He watched the expressions flitting across her face as she listened to his oldest child. The affection was obvious.

"She just wants to spend some time with you, and do something to help you."   Brianna assured her.

"Well, can't she take me to a movie or something? Does it have to be clothes?"

Brianna thought quickly. "Did she actually say clothes shopping or did she just say shopping to get you ready for school?"

Stephanie had to replay her grandmother's words in her head. "She just said she wanted to take me back-to-school shopping."

"Okay, so let her take you for your binders and stuff, so she feels included and helpful. You and I will shop for clothes."

"Oh thank you! Brianna you're the best! When can we go?"

"I'll talk to your Dad and find a day later this week." Brianna promised.

"Great! You go talk to him, I'll go talk to Grandma. See you later. Love you."

Brianna blinked, eyes suddenly burning. "Love you too sweetie." Hanging up, she looked up to find Jon watching her.

"Sucker."

"What?" She frowned.

"She suckered you into to taking her shopping. Mom won't take her to the places she likes, so she suckered you into it."

"Why do you think that would be a hardship for me? You've seen my wardrobe." She picked up the phone again.

"Who are you calling?" The glint in her eyes gave him a bad feeling his 'sucker' crack was going to hurt his bank account.

"I need to let Kenneth know we're coming. I want to make sure he has the full fall and winter line available."

Yep, he could hear his accountant crying already.

Hanging up with Kenneth, she refocused on Jon, a speculative look on her face.

"What?" He asked warily.

"How are Jake and Romeo set for clothes?"

His blank expression answered her question even more than his words. "Uhhh.....they have some."

Brianna snorted. "Do you want me to come out to the house and check what they need? Or will your mother do it?"

"Since my children don't have faith in their grandmother's taste in clothes, I guess you'd better do it." His stomach growled and he glanced at his watch. "Work day is done, let's go grab some dinner."

Brianna shoved the mail in her briefcase, grabbed her purse and joined him.


At the restaurant, while they were waiting for their food, she pulled a file out of her briefcase. Before she could open it, he reached over and put his hand on it, preventing her from opening it. "No."

"No?"

"No. This is a dinner date not a work dinner remember."

"Ah. Right. Sorry." She put the folder away with a smile, gave him her full attention and batted her eyelashes.

He laughed. "You're nuts."

Their conversation was a continuation of their late night chats in his living room. It was easy and open, like they'd known each other for years.

Back at her apartment building, they both greeted Sam, the night doorman, and took the elevator to her floor. Brianna turned her key in the lock, but Jon stopped her from opening the door with a hand on her arm, knowing if he stepped inside he wouldn't leave and he needed to get home.

His hands game up to frame her face and tilt it towards his. He stared down at her for a moment before his head dipped and his mouth took possession of hers. The kiss was deep and heady and they were both breathing heavily when it ended.

He stroked her cheek with his thumb. "Come out to the house tomorrow. You can check out the kids’ clothes and see what they need, and you and Steph can make your shopping plans." And maybe you and I can make some loving plans!

Brianna nodded and licked her tingling lips.

Jon groaned and bent to kiss her again. Tearing himself away, he smiled ruefully. "Temptress! Do you know how uncomfortable it is to drive with a hard-on?"

Her chuckle was more of a throaty purr - which didn't help his physical condition at all. "I could help you with that."

"Mmm hmm, but then I wouldn't get home until tomorrow and as much as I would like that, it wouldn't be fair to Mom."

"Or the kids." She agreed. She gave him another brief kiss, then pushed him gently away. "Goodnight. Thanks for dinner. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Nite." Blowing out a frustrated breath he turned and started for the elevator.

Brianna slipped inside her apartment, closing and locking the door while she still had the strength of will to let him go. Leaning against the door, a soft smile curved her lips. Maybe this might work out after all.


Saturday, April 12, 2014

Chapter 67


Matt was waiting in the foyer when Jon walked into the house. He glanced at his watch. "What are you doing home so early? I thought you were spending time with your girlfriend."

"So did I." Jon scowled. "She shut the door in my face."

"Uh oh."

Their voices faded as they walked towards the living room.



Stephanie frowned as she continued down the hallway to her bedroom. Sitting on the bed, she contemplated what she'd just overheard. Daddy has a girlfriend? Her emotions were in turmoil over that news. She wanted her father to be happy, but the idea of another woman taking her mother's place in their lives......she just wasn't sure she was ready for that.



"What happened?" Desiree asked upon seeing Jon. "I thought you had a date."

"She didn't want to see him." Matt answered.

She studied her brother-in-law's face. "What did you do?"

"What makes you think I did something?" Jon turned his scowl on her.

"Because women don't turn you away.....unless you do something to piss them off."

He sighed. "She said she had hoped to spend her Saturday night with her boyfriend, but she didn't have one and she wouldn't be my whore."

Desiree stared at him, deep in thought. "I think I'm missing part of the story. I thought you'd talked to her and agreed to give a relationship a try."

"We did."

"Then why did she say she doesn't have a boyfriend?"

Jon shifted uncomfortably.

Desiree eyed him suspiciously. "Did you call her at all this week?"

"Yes." he answered defensively. "She came up with the idea of releasing an album but not touring it."

"Did you talk about anything personal and not work related?"

He was back to shifting uncomfortably. "No, I guess not."

"And you only called her the once?"

"Yes, but that's not unusual. There have been weeks I haven't called her at all."

"But that was when she was just your assistant."

"So?"

"Let me make sure I've got this straight. You spend the night with her last weekend, call her once in a week and that was just to talk about work......and you can't figure out why she's pissed off?" She shook her head. "Oh Jon."

"What?"

"I know it's been a couple decades since you've dated, but have you forgotten so much? For that matter, during the years of your marriage did you learn nothing about women?"

"Even I know ignoring them is not a smart move bro." Matt added.

"I've got a lot going on." Even to his own ear it was a lame excuse.

"Uh huh." Desiree responded dryly. "But I thought you wanted something more than just a roll in the sheets."

Jon raked his hand through his hair and leaned back on the couch. "Women drive me nuts!"

Matt patted his shoulder. "Yeah, but we love them anyway." He ducked his wife's swat and blew her a kiss.

"She's obviously not a woman that's going to be swayed by your fame, fortune or good looks." Desiree warned him. "You're going to have to put in some effort."

Jon sighed, but nodded.



Upstairs, Stephanie walked into her oldest brother's bedroom and closed the door. "Dad's got a girlfriend."

"What? How do you know that?"

"He's home. I heard him and Uncle Matt talking. I guess Dad went to see her tonight."

"Who is it? Do we know her?"

"I don't know. I didn't hear a name." She frowned. "What do you think?"

Jesse shrugged. "I don't know."

"Well think about it! Do you want somebody taking Mom's place?"

It was his turn to frown.



When Carol arrived the next day to check on them, she found the house almost eerily quiet, the atmosphere slightly tense. Jake and Romeo were napping, but she found the others sitting outside, Stephanie reading a book, Jesse playing a hand held game and Jon staring at the river, a book forgotten in his lap. All of them were so lost in their own worlds they hadn't heard the gate buzzer - or the door. They all jumped when she spoke. "Hey guys."

"Hi Grandma."

"Hey Mom. What's up?"

"Just came by to see how you're doing." She studied her grand children's faces. "What's wrong with you two?"

Stephanie and Jesse exchanged a look and shot a quick glance at their father. "Nothing."

Jon frowned at his children. Had he been so caught up in his own issues that he'd ignored them - again? "Are you sure?"

"Yeah Dad, we're fine."

He wasn't sure he believed them, but he didn't know how to draw them out. Bri was so much better at helping them cope with their grief than he was.

Bri. He still needed to figure out how to get himself out of the hole he'd dug with her. Something told him she wasn't going to make it easy for him.

"Jon would you get me a glass of iced tea please?"

"Sure."

When he'd closed the door behind him, Carol turned to her grandchildren. "Okay spill it. What's going on?"

Jesse shrugged and Stephanie shifted in her chair.

"Steph? What is it? Come on, talk to me."

"We......we think Dad might have a girlfriend."

Carol wondered why they would think that and who it might be, but that wasn't the important point at the moment. "And that idea bothers you?"

This time they both shrugged.

"Do you feel like that would be a betrayal to your mother?"

"Kinda." Stephanie admitted.

Carol hesitated, then lifted her purse onto her lap, to search through it. Pulling out an envelope, she handed it to Stephanie. "Both of you read that. It might help. We can talk about it after if you want."

Stephanie read their names on the front in her mother's handwriting, but before she could ask, the door opened and she shoved the envelope into her book before her father sat down.

After visiting with their grandmother long enough to avoid their father's suspicion, they excused themselves and ran upstairs. Sitting together on Stephanie's bed, she opened the envelope and pulled out the neatly folded sheets of paper. The sight of their mother's familiar handwriting made her hands tremble.

Steph and Jesse,

I'm writing this to you, because you two are old enough to understand and respect both my wishes and your father's needs. He and I love each other very much and have ever since we were not a lot older than you are now.

Love means wanting the other person to be happy, even if you can't be the one to bring him that happiness anymore. I want that for your father - for all of you. I don't want him to be lonely. I want him to find love again, even get married again. And I don't want him to wait a long time either. So when he finds a girlfriend, don't be mad at him. Don't think that he is betraying me and what we had together. He's doing what I want - finding happiness again and someone to help the four of you do that as well.

As for the woman he chooses.....you may have to help him a little with that. Make sure he finds the right person for all of you. She needs to be kind and caring, but not a pushover. She can't be after his fame and money, but she needs to understand and support his job and the time and effort it takes, and of course how to deal with the reporters. Someone who can make you laugh and comfort you when you're hurt or sad. Someone who will help you remember your past as well as prepare for the future.

But most of all, she needs to love you, all of you, with all of her heart. When you find that woman, welcome her into your lives and hearts with open arms....and don't let Dad blow it! The betrayal to me will be if you accept anything less.....or refuse it.

Be happy.

I love you.

Mom


They sat in silence, both digesting their mother's words and the meaning behind them.....and if there was anyone they knew that met the requirements she outlined and that they actually liked. Suddenly, they looked at each other, smiles curving their lips.

"Brianna!"


Saturday, April 5, 2014

Chapter 66


Bright sun streaming through the window pulled Jon from a sound sleep. As he surfaced towards wakefulness, he became aware of the familiar warmth of a female body in the curve of his. A split second later his brain registered that something was....off. Then it hit him. It wasn't the woman who'd occupied that spot for most of his adult life.

She was gone.

Easing away without waking Brianna, he rose from the bed, pulled on his jeans and left the room. He found his way to the kitchen and a search of the cupboards yielded the makings for coffee. While he waited for it to brew, he tried to sort out his thoughts and feelings.

He'd slept better than he had in over a year. Waking up with Brianna had felt different.....but very natural and right. So why did he feel so guilty? He wasn't cheating on anyone and neither was she. Who did he think he was betraying? Dot? But she was gone....and he was doing what she wanted. Brianna? But he was with her because he wanted to be, not because it was easy and what Dot wanted.....right? Himself? But he was ready to move on and find happiness again....wasn't he?

Filling his cup, he wandered into the living room. Tico's painting caught his eye and he moved to stand in front of it and contemplate his life and his future.



Brianna stretched, rolled over and sighed. The small aches in her body reminded her of the events of the night before. She knew before she opened her eyes and turned her head that she was alone in the room. The warmth of the sheets beside her told her he hadn't been gone for long.

She thought at first that he might be in the bathroom, but when he didn't return after a few minutes, she stared at the ceiling and frowned. Had he left? Surely he would have awakened her to say goodbye....or at least left a note. A quick look revealed his shirt and shoes on the floor beside the bed. He hadn't left. So where was he? Was he feeling guilty?

Talking about having a relationship was one thing, actually trying to have one was something else. Particularly in this case with him being a recent widower and four children to consider. Maybe now that the fog of lust and passion was lifted he'd decided it was going to be too difficult, or it was too soon or something. She'd be lying if she said she didn't have some concerns herself.

She wasn't going to find any answers lying in bed. Rising, she pulled on her robe - the silk kimono from Japan. She remembered the look in his eyes when she'd tried it on and needed the confidence boost this morning.

She found him in the living room sipping coffee and staring at Tico's painting. "Good morning. You're up early. Couldn't sleep?"

Jon turned at the sound of her voice, but didn't move towards her. "Morning." His eyes licked over her appreciatively. "I made coffee." He walked away from her to the door to the balcony and looked out. "Looks like it's going to be another hot one."

She frowned at his evasion. "Who's with the kids?"

"Matt and Desiree." He glanced at his watch. "I should relieve them soon."

"Jon..."

"Are you hungry?"

"Not yet." Her eyes narrowed. "Is it regret or guilt?"

"What?"

"The reason you're up so early......and the reason you're being so distant with me. Things often look different in the bright light of the morning after. Do you regret last night? Are you having second thoughts about us?"

He shook his head. "No, I don't regret last night."

When he didn't say anymore, she prodded. "But you're having second thoughts about us having a relationship outside of work."

"No." He grimaced. "It's just....."

"Not as easy as you thought it was going to be?" She guessed. "It's a complicated situation."

He snorted at her understatement. "Ya think?"

Brianna sighed. She was going to need coffee for this conversation.

Jon watched her walk away from him and felt even worse. He followed her into the kitchen.

Turning with the coffee pot in her hand, she raised it towards him and refilled his cup when he held it out.

"Thanks." He frowned as she silently set down the pot and pulled out a frying pan and bacon.

While she cooked, she gathered her thoughts and tried to think of what to say. She really didn't have a clue.

Jon mentally kicked himself when he realized the greeting he'd given her was fine for an employee, but not for a girlfriend, especially after the incredible pleasure they'd shared the night before. He sat his cup on the table and stepped up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to ignore you."

She leaned back against him and squeezed his arm. "I know. This isn't easy for either of us. There'll be a lot of stuff we'll have to work out."

The smell of bacon made his stomach growl. "Can we eat first?"

Brianna laughed. "Do you want to make the eggs or the toast?"



As soon as they finished eating Jon glanced at his watch and carried his plate over to the sink. "I hate to eat and run, but I need to get home to the kids."

"But..." She sighed. "Okay." She couldn't compete with his kids.....and wouldn't try if she could. So much for having a conversation about how this relationship will work. Maybe he just needed a little more time to figure it out.

She put food away while he finished getting dressed, and walked him to the door.

He leaned down to kiss her. "I'll call you later."

"Okay. Say hi to the kids - and Matt and Desiree - for me."

"I will. See you later."

Closing the door behind him, Brianna returned to the kitchen to finish cleaning up....and fought the feeling of being used and set aside now that his lust was sated. Don't go there! Give him the benefit of the doubt.




She didn't hear from him until three days later. He called her at the office.

"Hey. I think maybe it's time to start accepting a few invitations."

"Okay, if you feel ready. Do you want me to pick out the ones I think would be the best ones or do you want to look over all of them and decide for yourself?"

"You pick some out and I'll decide from those."

"Okay." She tried to shift the conversation to a more personal one. "How's everything there? The kids doing okay?"

"Yeah, they're fine."

"And you?" It was like pulling teeth!

"I'm fine. I'd really like to get back into the studio, but I don't think the kids are ready for me to tour yet."

Still a work related answer. She wanted to strangle him, but decided not to push it.....for now. "Have you thought about releasing an album, but not touring it? Maybe do a few shows here and there? It would give you a creative release without taking you away from the kids for large periods of time."

The idea intrigued him. "Hmmm. That's a possibility. Maybe I'll talk to the guys and Paul. Anything urgent or interesting today?"

"No, things have been pretty quiet. But if you start accepting invitations I'm sure that will change." She hesitated. "Jon....when am I going to see you?"

"Yeah....soon. Oh, Jesse's calling for me, I've got to go. I'll call you."

Brianna stared at the dead phone in her hand and felt the sting of unshed tears burning her eyes. She felt like she was back in high school chasing after a crush that said all the right words to get what he wanted - but he only wanted one thing. Pathetic! Maybe, despite his assurances, he really wasn't ready for a relationship. Or maybe he just sucked at being a boyfriend. Either way this wasn't going to work for her. She was going to have to decide whether to hang in and see if it got better....or cut her losses before she got in any deeper emotionally.

Four days later - with no phone call - turned her hurt and indecision to anger. When he finally showed up at her door on Saturday night she was ready to make her feelings regarding his behaviour clear.

"Hey babe." He greeted her when she answered his knock.

"Hi Boss. What's up? Do you need something? A letter written or a project researched?"

Her business tone should have warned him, but he ignored it. "No."

"You're not here about work?" She wanted to be perfectly clear.

"No."

"So this is a booty call."

"No!" He tried to step into her apartment, but she wouldn't move out of the doorway. "Aren't you going to let me in?"

"No. I'm off the clock. I was hoping to spend some time with my boyfriend, but apparently I don't have one. Have a safe drive back to Red Bank."

"Bri, come on!"

"I told you Jon, I won't be your whore."

The door closed firmly in his face.


He was stunned. "What the fuck?"