Chapter 58

Brianna hung up and sighed. Part of the reason she'd left the mansion on the Navesink was to force Jon to re-engage with his children - with life! The hope had been that this situation could be avoided.

But it hadn't worked.

The beauty of the fall colours nature was displaying on the drive to New Jersey went largely unnoticed. Brianna's mind was consumed by what she was going to have to do when she got there. Despite the instructions from Dot, she wasn't sure she had the knowledge - or intestinal fortitude - to pull him out of the dark place he'd sunk into.

Parking in her usual spot, Brianna sighed and trudged towards the house.

"Hi." Carol stood in the doorway.

"Hi." Brianna tried to smile. "How bad is it?"

"Come sit down and have a cup of coffee....or maybe you'd prefer a glass of wine....and we'll fill you in."

"That bad huh?"

"Mmmmm."

David, Matt, Tony and John Sr. were in the kitchen when they entered.

Brianna took one look at their faces and opted for wine. "So, what happened?"

"He completely shut down." John Sr. began.

"He hasn't come out of his room in almost a week." Tony added.

"He won't talk to anyone. Not even the kids. Every time I go in he's sleeping." Carol concluded.

"Okay." Brianna sighed and nodded.

"Can you help?" Matt asked.

"I don't know." Brianna replied honestly. "Dorothea warned me this could happen and explained what I should do, but......it's not pleasant." She grimaced. "Where are the kids?"

"Linda took them for the weekend." Carol answered.

"Good. This could get loud and.....ugly."

"Is there anything we can do to help?" Tony offered.

Brianna shook her head. "No. Just.....don't judge me by what you may hear me say to him."

"Tough love." David understood her meaning.

Everyone around the table exchanged glances and nodded.

"Do what you need to do honey." Jon's Sr. encouraged her. "We'll back you up."

"Thanks." Brianna drained her glass and stood. "Wish me luck."

Upstairs, she put her bag in her room and changed into comfortable clothing. This could take awhile.

She stood outside Jon's door trying to gather her courage. Please God let this work! She knocked and opened the door. "Okay Jon, enough wallowing in grief and self pity. It's time get up and rejoin the living."

He didn't even open his eyes. "Leave me alone."

"Can't do that. You've indulged long enough." She walked to the windows and opened the drapes, letting in the waning daylight and the setting sun.

Jon just rolled over and buried his head in his pillow.

She stepped closer. "Jon, come on. Get up."

"Go. Away."

"No. Not until you get up."

He remained silent.

"Come on Jon. You've got four kids that need you."

She went on for over ten minutes, but he didn't even respond.

Brianna took a deep breath. "They just lost their mother Jon, are you going to deprive them of a father too? Is that what you want? For your children to be orphans?"

Still nothing.

"Dorothea died Jon. Should we be digging a grave beside her for you?"

When he still didn't respond, she looked up at the ceiling. Dot help me! Swallowing, heavily, she took a deep breath. "She left your children, Jon. Are you going to do the same? Will Tony or Matt get to walk Stephanie down the aisle when she gets married? Cheer Jesse on when he plays college football, maybe even the NFL? And what about the little ones? Jake will probably barely remember Dot, and Romeo won't remember her at all. Is that what you want too? To just be a picture in an album to your children? Dot...."

"Brianna! Leave Dot out of this! She was a wonderful mother!"

The use of her full name told her she was getting to him. Anger was better than nothing. Dot you'd better be right about him forgiving me when he calms down. "Yes, she was, but she left, Jon. She left her children......and she left you. She didn't care enough to stick around."

"Stop it!" He sat up and glared at her.

"She talked about how much she loved all of you, but not enough to put up with a little discomfort and fight to stay with you." 

"You're fired!" Fists clenching in his pillow, he threw it at her.....and missed.

Tears streamed down her cheeks at the pain she was inflicting. "She gave up. Devastated your children and left you to pick up the pieces."

"SHUT UP!"

"It's no wonder you're so depressed. The love of your life decided you weren't worth the effort and left you."

Flying off the bed, he grabbed her by the shoulders and slammed her against the wall. "SHUT. THE FUCK. UP!"

"Everyone understands why you're upset. She basically dumped you."

"ARRRGH!" He pushed away and stomped around the bedroom.

"After everything you gave her.....she was living every woman's dream.....but it wasn't enough. Nothing you did was enough for her to make the effort. What a selfish bitch."

She saw it in his face the split second before he snapped. His hand closed around the bottle of Dorothea's perfume sitting on a dresser. Pivoting, he pitched it against the wall where it shattered. "The bitch left me!"

He toured around the room in search of more missiles. Anything that he could lift got thrown as hard as he could. "She just....left me!" Smash. "She promised she'd fight, but she gave up!" Crash. "She fucking gave up! On all of us!"

Downstairs, the sound of glass breaking and objects hitting the wall had the group still sitting in the kitchen looking towards the stairs.

"Should we go make sure they're okay?" Carol suggested.

David shook his head. "Let's wait. Brianna will let us know if they need help."

Upstairs, Brianna let him rant and rave while she focused on staying out of the line of fire.....and ignoring his nakedness.

Finally, Jon ran out of steam and sank down on the side of the bed. Resting his elbows on his knees, he buried his face in his hands.

Brianna saw his shoulders shaking and her heart ached for him. Judging it was safe to approach him, she sat beside him, hugging him with one arm and rubbing his back with the other. There were no words to make everything better, so she stayed silent.

He blew out a ragged breath. "She's gone."

"Mmmhmm."

Jon shifted, lying back on the bed, taking Brianna with him. He rolled until he was resting his head on her chest. Her arms cradled him. "What am I going to do without her?"

She stroked his hair. "You'll figure it out. You and the kids. You're strong. You'll all find your way. The family will help if you need it."

He was quiet so long, Brianna thought he'd fallen asleep, until his hand came up to grip her side, thumb rubbing the side of her breast. He rose up on an elbow to capture her mouth with his.

Brianna stiffened momentarily, uncomfortable with what was happening, but the look in his eye and the desperation she could taste in his kiss told her that he needed the physical release as much as he'd needed the emotional one. Relaxing, she let him do as he wished.

Distracted by his kiss, she barely noticed her clothes disappearing beneath his touch. The feel of his calluses lightly scraping her breasts brought her awareness to her nakedness and she shivered.

Jon let his hands roam, not really aware of what he was doing. His whole being was focused on finding pleasure induced oblivion. Even so, some part of his brain noted that her body reacted quickly to his touch. While his tongue stroked her hers, his hands stroked her body, lingering in her sensitive spots, until a fine sheen of sweat coated her skin. 

Two fingers slid between the swollen folds at the apex of her thighs to test her readiness. Feeling her wetness, he wasted no time plunging into her welcoming body. His eyes closed at the blissful pleasure of her humid sheath grasping his already throbbing erection.

Brianna inhaled sharply at his sudden entry, then moaned at the bolts of pleasure spotting through her as he began to move. Her hips lifted to match his rhythm. While her body felt the pleasure - in fact, was quickly overwhelmed by it - her mind sensed a lack of connection that had up until now accompanied their lovemaking.

She was right. Jon's entire being was focused on finding physical release. When she tore her mouth from his to gasp for breath, he didn't look at her, he just buried his face in her neck. Her orgasmic cries went largely unnoticed.

But release wasn't coming easily for him tonight. Sliding his hands under her hips, he angled them towards him so that he could reach deeper, and increased his speed.

It still wasn't enough.

Drenched in sweat and almost desperate, Jon lifted her legs onto his shoulders and fully extended his arms. All gentleness deserted him as he pounded into her, panting and straining.

"JON!" Brianna screamed as another orgasm crashed over herald her whole body went rigid.

Her channel clamping around his embedded erection like a vice finally pulled him over the edge. With a grunt, he collapsed onto her as his body emptied deep inside her. When he could gather enough strength, he withdrew from her body and rolled to the side.

Within minutes, his deep, even breathing told Brianna he was asleep. But she wasn't so lucky. She was still awake when pink rays of dawn lit up the sky. She prayed that her efforts worked, otherwise she'd just prostituted herself for nothing.